we lie bedded at opposite ends you reaching for my heel i kick it up near your heart. your feet crossed in the crook of my elbow, socks wearing thin. the square inches of you and holding our weight the bed cries more, more. everything laid upon. and here i pressed my fingertips against my heavy eyes. i pondered the word satchel and that there would be memories of your red shirt waiting, perhaps forever. our thoughts for each other dim. there seems to be no answer to a question coming slowly. and that's what it's like only ten times brighter, only ten times more horrible.